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Other Humorous Stories' ...Some Even True Break Dancing Ozark Style © 2007 - Joseph L Snurr, Sr. |
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The men of our church planned a camp out in an extremely remote area along
the Beautiful Buffalo River in the Ozark Mountains of Arkansas. In fact,
it was so remote that as we passed one house, there was a sign at the entrance
of the driveway that said, "NOWHERE." I personally think we were indeed
beyond nowhere.
We traveled down dirt roads, gravel roads, grass roads, washed out roads, ruts, grassy paths and fields complete with cattle. Yes, no average car would get into this place. One must use a four wheel drive vehicle to ensure a safe return home.
We rode a long and bumpy ride over and down these mountains, seeing some of the most magnificent scenery. There were two gates which had to be opened and closed by the person nearest the passenger door; That's why it's best to sit in the middle of a pickup truck.... You don't have to drive, and you don't have to open and shut gates. Of course that one in the middle is the true redneck... After traversing these gorgeous places (but horrid roads) which is part all part of the Arkansas Ozarks, we entered a flat grassy pasture, beyond which there were trees. I thought to myself that beyond those trees was the Beautiful Buffalo River. But I couldn't have been more mistaken. We crossed the grassy pasture and on into the trees. As we passed into the trees, I'm thinking, 'How much further IS this?!?
Of course, you know how rough a preacher's life is. He deserves all the comforts and amenities of home he can get. Even those army cots he's got in there, ...and the blankets, and ...and trash can... Huh? A TRASH CAN?!? How utterly neat! ...and in more ways than one.
We put our campfire and chatter area in an open spot in the trees, where there was a very serene place where one could relax and comune with God's awesome creation from which we could see the Buffalo River below us. It was a place about 20 feet higher than the Buffalo River around 70 feet away from us just beyond the "beach" consisting of relatively smooth stones which we call river rock. When I can, I enjoy walking barefoot across the stones because they do sort of a massage on the bottoms of the feet and make the feet feel so good. Sure beats foot baths in hot water.
We didn't have any climbing equipment, and I'm not too fond of falling too fond of falling that distance.
One of our men, James, is very educated in wildlife and plant life. He knows what they are and pretty much what they are good for. He knows the calls and songs of the birds which I think is so wonderful.
I saw, on the other side, the rocky outcrops high above the river. I beauty like this can only be attributed to a Great God. In the rocks of this bluff were caves. I would have loved to explore them, but I wasn't willing to get my feet wet. Besides most of them were 30-50 feet up the side of the cliffs. Again, I'm not into falling those distances. Not that the weightlessness of the drop wouldn't be enjoyable, but that sudden stop at the bottom isn't what I would consider a good time.
It was spring, so the trees weren't completely green yet... But getting there. The soft sound of the waters flowing by is so relaxing. Seeing things floating by would perk up your inquisitiveness, even if it's a leaf, or branch. I would try to figure out what kind of tree is may have been that lost it's leaf. No matter where or which way you look, there was something that would catch your attention, and ask for your continued attention.
All this could keep my imagination peaked for a long time. If I could only have gotten to the caves. As a teen, I loved spelunking and climbing cliffs and walking along the brim of cliffs. I had little fear. Many times I should have learned that it was dangerous; especially when I nearly DID fall about 40 feet from a sheer cliff.
Wisely, I stayed on the River Bottom and looked up at the caves. That River bottom was beautiful.... Looking toward the west in the afternoon, this old tree, barely standing, not many leaves, and I think barely alive, but struggling on to show it's remaining beauty in life. In the morning, as the sun begins to brighten the sky, the misty rolls into the river bottom, making for a lovely haze that is beautiful... pretty enough to photograph.
During our trip, a few of the men told us of a place that was so beautiful that we would never want to miss it. It was a gorgeous waterfall and must take our cameras or regret it. We decided to take a drive to the falls on Saturday morning (two days ago). There were some of the men who would leave and go home after visiting the water fall. The rest of us would go back to camp and pack up. Considering, we took three pickup trucks up the mountain. There was a truck in front of us with Chuck, the driver, and Eric as passenger, I was in the back of the middle truck and Matt was driving the truck behind us. David was driving our truck and Perry and Will was in the back with me, and James riding shotgun (passenger's seat). Being it was a mountain road, the Will and I were standing in the truck-bed and against the cab of David's truck. Perry was sitting on the wheel well. As we bounced along over the stones, rocks, and water ruts, we had to pay attention low hanging limbs, vines, and other potential obstacles so we could keep our balance. We were only traveling about 5-10 miles per hour so we would have time to duck and lean for this limb or that branch or the vine up there. I looked ahead, and there was a small tree leaning out over the road. I could break off a dead tree like that one, so as we approached, I reached out and grasped the tree and, bracing myself, I pushed it forward to break it from the ground and into the wood. But THIS tree had to be stubborn. Ok, so trees can't be stubborn... but it was definitely defiant and rebellious. I pushed hard and soon discovered it wasn't dead, but rather, it was definitely still alive and firmly attached to the ground... and it was pulling me back toward the open tailgate. To save myself from hanging from the tree to be soon landing on the hood of Matt's truck, I quickly let go of the tree. Since I was well braced as let go of the tree, I flew forward into the cab. Then as I fell against the side of the truck bed, my hat flew off and I pushed up with all I had and made a very feeble attempt at grasping for it because the truck was going forward at about the same speed as I was going toward the back of the truck. Yeah... after all that work, I still missed it and in the back of my mind I'm thinking, this is NOT good... because I saw myself headed straight for the tailgate and at my momentum, I think I'd have hit the front of Matt's truck before hitting the ground. What saved me from getting run over by Matt? David, my driver, realized there was a problem in the back... and he STEPPED on the BRAKE !!!! ...and being on an upgrade, I think we must have stopped instantaneously. So now I'm saved from flying headlong from the tailgate back toward the cab, but I land on my back and [I think] inertia kept me rolling because the last thing I remembered was being on my shoulders and my feet being where my head should be... at the top of me. Then as I came to my senses, I saw faces and I'm thinking, 'Who ARE these people?!?' As I lay there wondering what happened to me, I hear someone ask, "Joseph, are you alright?" and someone else saying, "Are you ok, Joseph?" I think, "Oh, I know him... That's Pastor Will. And That guy looks like Perry, and.... It was about that point when Matt said while grinning, "I was going to run over your hat..." and I think he added, "...so it would stay there." Up to my Brake Dancing Ozark Style, I was thinking I should have ridden with Matt. Then I snuggled myself into the corner of the truck bed, where I once stood. Or should that be that I cowered? Naw, I snuggled because by this time, I know what true love really is. I loved the protection and safety I have in that corner. Oh yes, we were about 75 feet from the place where we park one truck, and go down another, worse, road. Well, if this is what a mountain top experience is, I really don't think I can take it. {grin} I was told later that I looked a bit like a fish out of water, flopping this way and that. Now that's kind of funny... So we continued on and to the water fall. We drove down this long trail to where there was once an old ranch. From there we walked about 50 yards or so where we stood at the top of a bluff. To our left was a beautiful waterfall. We walked to the right along the top of the bluff until we found a place where we could drop down into the ravine. We walked along the bottom of the bluff, deeper and deeper into the ravine. Then as we looked up, the walls were about 75 feet high and the floor was about 25 feet further down. We got to the hollowed out area behind the falls where we pondered Romans 120 and John 11-14. It was so beautiful... The birds singing, wildflowers in full bloom, God's Creation speaking loudly of His Glory, Power and Authority. Then we decided to leave by going on below the other side, and get up on the top from there. We walked, inspected each little cave, each den of the wildlife and we'd discovered a birds nest in the mouth of a cave where there were young birds. Finally when it seemed that the path would cease, and become a drop into the ravine which was by now about 75 or more feet down, we find another cave. Looking into it, we find that it simply pierces the ridge and exited on the side where the Buffalo River was... and it was far below us by [I'm sure] far more than 500 feet... maybe as much as 750 feet. The Buffalo River looked like a stream from up there. We climbed along this fairly wide area above the sheer bluffs. But the top was about 20 feet or so above us. As we walked, there were outcrops of rock where we could step out and get a view of the Buffalo River like you wouldn't believe. I've seen no where as beautiful with the magnificence of God, as this. We found a cave which we explored a little. Perry, Matt, Chuck and I had gone in about 15 feet to where it was only about 18-20 inches high, and Eric went another 15 feet to where there was a small room... but it went deeper. Finally, with more climbing, we were able to get up on top of the bluff. As we hiked back over the ridge, Matt says, "Hey, there's my truck," and sure enough, on the next ridge, there was a blue place where the truck was. As we went down into the gully, we found the stream that feeds the water fall, and stopped to get a good cold drink of clear sparkling mountain water.... And cold wet feet as we crossed. While we lingered here, looking down over the bluff of the water fall, and gazing down the ravine, some of the men went on as they had a busy schedule awaiting them. A few minutes later, we made it back to the only truck left. And it was only a two wheel drive truck. Uh-huh! A perfect time to start praying because some of this road is steep, as we soon discovered. Matt began pulling out and started slipping. Then he backed up and tried again and likewise, began slipping in the grass. Are you aware that damp grass mixed with dirt can get slicker than snot on a door-knob?!? Then he backed up as far back as he could, I think... and mashed down on the gas peddle. With us bumping and thumping about in the back of the truck, he started up the mountain. I was just glad we were all sitting down, except for David who was sitting on the side of the truck bed. I thought, "We'll lose him down one of these ravines somewhere up the hill." As we quickly progressed up the road, I was being bumped about more than I liked and thought, 'I'll just reposition myself.' Wrong idea!! I lifted myself up on my hands and, Matt either hit the gas pedal or we hit a bump, and I think it was the bump, but never-the-less, I flew headlong across the truck bed and into the laps of Will and Perry. Well, my face was nearly buried in the bed liner between them, and an arm in each of their laps. I think that next time I'm taking a very large roll of duct tape so I can be taped in. Tape me to the bumper or over the hood like a deer. Next time I'm staying securely IN the truck... I hope. But the neatest thing happened in this all. All this brought out a good Biblical truth. We might go through some horrible things in life, and some of them very painful, and others emotional... but in the end, we have the pleasure of sitting in the very presence of God; taking in His Word, and knowing there is nothing to worry about.
From Us The Pastor Contact Us |
We drove along the ridges high above the Buffalo River. It's a steep
slope down and out to where it just dropps off for hundreds of feet to the
river bottom below.
While we are to travel the straight and narrow road,
THIS road was
quite narrow, and one has to negotiate their vehicle around the trees, stumps,
and rocks...
Then after passing through yet another much larger flat grassy pasture.
We drove in what appeared to be the tracks of a previous vehicle, along the
edge of the trees and then across the pasture toward another row of trees.
Above the trees, one could clearly see one of the magnificent bluffs that
grace the length of the Buffalo River.
There come the Pastor pulling his camper. Sure enough, it's taking him
almost 40 acres to turn that thing around. He's got a camper, but the
rest of us had to use tents, or sleep under the stars. But that's ok,
because in the morning, we could wake him up easily, since bangins on a tin
camper makes a lot more noise than a fabric tent.
We set up the the tents and general sleeping area in the grassy field next to
the tree line. That would be a nice place for wildlife and other critters
to find us.
It was a magnificently beautiful place... Virtually untouched by
mankind. In the bluff across the river, we could see caves and I think
we all wished we could explore them. But we weren't getting wet for anyone
that day. Besides, the bluff was, I'm sure, over 100 feet high and
the caves were about 40-80 feet up the side.
There comes our Pastor down through the woods toward the place at the river
where the camp fire was. I think that's Eric who is leaving. We
would sit and listen to the birds that were singing in the trees, and try to
guess what kind of bird was singing.
I walked down along the river just to see what all was there. It's like
this... From the river stones, there was nothing much there but
beauty, as these few photos will attest.
As I looked down stream, I saw the therapeutic style stone beach, the ridge
which bordered along the far side of the river, and the sky showing it's blue
and grey hues which reflected in the glistening waters of the river.
For instance, when I turned about and looked the other way, I saw even more
raw natural beauty. I wondered how it was that the steep bluffs on the
opposite side of the river became formed as they were, when this side was less
steep; rising only about 15 feet, then across the flat fields for
about a half mile before rising up the mountains.
